Post by mewmehh on Sept 28, 2019 18:14:09 GMT
Silver starlight dappled the sky as the makeshift camp slept in an eerie silence. Cold and uncharacteristically dead. It seemed those who weren't still out on patrol at the dead of night were nestled away, drained and sleeping before they would have to return to the obscene responsibilities that now befell Mothclan's true members. It was a hushed hurt all felt, but kept quiet after Eveningstar's outburst. Those who couldn't keep silent instead trusted their fates to the stars and took off. The thought had a blue queen hooked by the heart as she, too, but farewell a dear clanmate. Her own dear kit.
Bellfeather opened her mouth to speak, but was at a loss for words. Instead, Carrotflower' s dark blue crown pressed itself gingerly to his mother's cheek. In tandem, a cry choked itself in her throat. Carrotflower felt his guts twist up at the faint sound, but his eyes remained fixed and determined in their golden melancholia.
It had been only a few days after the whole debacle had occurred, but Carrotflower was sinking, drowning in all the negativity. In an instant, Eveningstar had become a stranger. No longer did he embody all the warmth and security Carrotflower had felt in his father; the connect was cold and black and dead. There was a distance tug, a fleeting whisper, but Carrotflower was certain it was simple an apparition of his own depression since Susanpaw’s disappearance. And with this stranger came many unfamiliar and foreboding cats who made his skin crawl with eye contact was made. His strung him up from the inside out to see cats like Milkberry and Onionclaw, once so full of life and vigor, fall to a sour silence, and Rosewish threatened to be rushed out alongside the others not born of Mothclan blood when they had done nothing wrong; to force retirement on cats simply scarred by showing honor in battle as warriors. All that negativity; it was clouding his senses and filled Carrotflower so full of despair that he couldn’t muster up the energy to eat or groom disheveled fur in days. Only water sated his nonexistent appetite, and finally he had reached his limit. It was time to go for broke lest he be broken. And he couldn't bear to fail Susanpaw's memory like that.
Thus, he had confided in the one cat whom he could; Slugheart, Lizardsnap, and Flintfoot were great, but as younger littermates, and with two being wrongly demoted, Carrotflower wasn’t sure he could look them in the eye and tell them he had been defeated and was leaving the clan. Any close friends he had, like Bubblefly or even the rough Hornstrike, were off in other clans or Starclan. Bellfeather was the only one whose gaze he cold meet; she had the most level head in the whole clan.
"Where will you go?" A whisper of hurt echoed in her hollow voice; it was soft and delicate, but airy and empty. Aquamarine eyes were dripping and wide, though glaze over, they were full of somber acceptance.
"Someplace where the hurting will stop," his waterlogged voice came out husky and low. Carrotflower fought against a swell of tears at the sight of his mother's drained face, the blue of her fur almost looking gray in the moonlight. Never before today had he realized how old she seemed to be. A small sob broke from his mother's lips and it broke his heart. But not as much as all the turmoil surrounding him. This was no longer his home.
Orange amber eyes glowing dull like fleeting embers, Carrotflower pull back and gazed solemnly at his mother’s downcast figure. Alongside her luminous eyes, a stark white blossom settled into the long tangle of fur at her cheek. It was a sweet memento- a gift from his father, he knew. A lasting glimpse of the secret tenderness he shared with Bellfeather before his death. The heavy pit in Carrotflower’s stomach weighed even more heavily; perhaps now it was simply a memento mori. A sign of more death to come.
With a final silent look, the tom stepped back into the dark shadows of the tall grass before turning away from Bellfeather’s streaming face and taking off towards the forest. With her broken cry finally splitting the air, Carrotflower bid his past, pained life adieu.
[After Susanpaw's death/disappearance and Carrotflower's empathy connection with his brother being severed, he has become an empath. Negativity make him ill and he had more or less been depressed throughout warriorhood, but this has finally forced his hand. He doesn’t want to hurt anymore, so he has decided to become a loner with no real goal in mind beside self-preservation.][/b]
Bellfeather opened her mouth to speak, but was at a loss for words. Instead, Carrotflower' s dark blue crown pressed itself gingerly to his mother's cheek. In tandem, a cry choked itself in her throat. Carrotflower felt his guts twist up at the faint sound, but his eyes remained fixed and determined in their golden melancholia.
It had been only a few days after the whole debacle had occurred, but Carrotflower was sinking, drowning in all the negativity. In an instant, Eveningstar had become a stranger. No longer did he embody all the warmth and security Carrotflower had felt in his father; the connect was cold and black and dead. There was a distance tug, a fleeting whisper, but Carrotflower was certain it was simple an apparition of his own depression since Susanpaw’s disappearance. And with this stranger came many unfamiliar and foreboding cats who made his skin crawl with eye contact was made. His strung him up from the inside out to see cats like Milkberry and Onionclaw, once so full of life and vigor, fall to a sour silence, and Rosewish threatened to be rushed out alongside the others not born of Mothclan blood when they had done nothing wrong; to force retirement on cats simply scarred by showing honor in battle as warriors. All that negativity; it was clouding his senses and filled Carrotflower so full of despair that he couldn’t muster up the energy to eat or groom disheveled fur in days. Only water sated his nonexistent appetite, and finally he had reached his limit. It was time to go for broke lest he be broken. And he couldn't bear to fail Susanpaw's memory like that.
Thus, he had confided in the one cat whom he could; Slugheart, Lizardsnap, and Flintfoot were great, but as younger littermates, and with two being wrongly demoted, Carrotflower wasn’t sure he could look them in the eye and tell them he had been defeated and was leaving the clan. Any close friends he had, like Bubblefly or even the rough Hornstrike, were off in other clans or Starclan. Bellfeather was the only one whose gaze he cold meet; she had the most level head in the whole clan.
"Where will you go?" A whisper of hurt echoed in her hollow voice; it was soft and delicate, but airy and empty. Aquamarine eyes were dripping and wide, though glaze over, they were full of somber acceptance.
"Someplace where the hurting will stop," his waterlogged voice came out husky and low. Carrotflower fought against a swell of tears at the sight of his mother's drained face, the blue of her fur almost looking gray in the moonlight. Never before today had he realized how old she seemed to be. A small sob broke from his mother's lips and it broke his heart. But not as much as all the turmoil surrounding him. This was no longer his home.
Orange amber eyes glowing dull like fleeting embers, Carrotflower pull back and gazed solemnly at his mother’s downcast figure. Alongside her luminous eyes, a stark white blossom settled into the long tangle of fur at her cheek. It was a sweet memento- a gift from his father, he knew. A lasting glimpse of the secret tenderness he shared with Bellfeather before his death. The heavy pit in Carrotflower’s stomach weighed even more heavily; perhaps now it was simply a memento mori. A sign of more death to come.
With a final silent look, the tom stepped back into the dark shadows of the tall grass before turning away from Bellfeather’s streaming face and taking off towards the forest. With her broken cry finally splitting the air, Carrotflower bid his past, pained life adieu.
[After Susanpaw's death/disappearance and Carrotflower's empathy connection with his brother being severed, he has become an empath. Negativity make him ill and he had more or less been depressed throughout warriorhood, but this has finally forced his hand. He doesn’t want to hurt anymore, so he has decided to become a loner with no real goal in mind beside self-preservation.][/b]
